A woman is only vulnerable when her nail polish is drying, and even then she can still pull a trigger.
some great quote I heard somewhere once upon a time and that is very, very true (via traffic-jam-session)

imthedad:

I like how pet is also the word for touching your pet

(Source: kamikaze95)



y2kid:

i will do a lot of things but admitting im cold to my mum who told me to bring a jacket isn’t one of them



smilestoinspire:

This is the greatest tweet in the history of tweets

breremma:

why do they even make underwear with tags??? just to tickle ur buttcrack???? what kind of sick joke is this???????????



thesassycat:

I wonder what it’s like to be a dog and eat the same exact thing everyday




titytwochainz:

you really a bitch if you let the microwave hit zeros while your family is asleep you disrespectful bitch




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